Tremendous Opportunity.

Disney and the other so-called "children's entertainment" companies are excited about creating virtual worlds for kids online.

"There is a massive opportunity here,” said Steve Wadsworth, president of the Walt Disney Internet Group, in an interview last week with the New York Times.

Let's be clear - the "massive opportunity" Mr. Wadsworth is touting, is the opportunity to sell kids shit they don't need - and lots of it.

Apparently it's working:

“It’s really fun to buy whatever you want inside the game,” Nathaniel said in a telephone interview. For his penguin, “like for Christmas I bought a fireplace, a flat-screen TV and a Christmas tree,” he said.

Why does a penguin need a flat-screen TV if not only to convince a 9-year old boy that an overpriced television manufactured by a corporate affilitate is essential to his childhood?

The Holidays.

The Holidays started the week before X-mas this year when Auntie A, Girl Cousin and the In Laws came to stay with us for a few days. It was the first time for us to meet Girl Cousin, who was born just eight days after Number One. She was delightful.

The girls had tummy time together. It sucked for them.

Given the potential for disaster with two infants in our little house, everything went amazingly well. The babies slept through the nights for the most part, and I didn't even talk politics with Mother In Law.

Then it was off to the Big D for four days of holiday fun...

All started out well and good, though I have to admit that chillin' in the car with the Wife breastfeeding behind the Arby's was not something I foresaw myself doing a year ago.

We made it to Omi's house, and after a quick visit to visit Sister and Boy Cousin - who is 12 days older than Number One and who we had also not met - we settled in for a long winter's nap. Or at least as long as she had been sleeping, which at that point was about nine hours.

From there, the sleeping went downhill as we traveled across the Metroplex and Number One's whole world was increasingly disrupted. Before the trip, she was sleeping for nine hour stretches starting at around 9:30 p.m.

Now, I'm blogging at 5:30 a.m., and I've been up for two hours, so I can't say that we're quite back on track.

Other than the sleep issues, the Holiday was wonderful.

Number One was, of course, the Belle of the Ball, meeting a whole family she never knew she had. The generosity of the Family and the In Laws was beyond compare, and we all had a very good time.

SuperWife got me a homebrewing kit, which I plan to put into action this weekend. I'm sure there will be more on this later...

I even had my first really serious hangover since Number One's arrival. I'm blaming Pop and his cigars. (Poor decision making and terrible parenting on my part were the real culprit.)

Success.

I saved the whales.

Thank you, Japan, for responding to my request to not kill Humpback Whales. Now, could you please not kill the 1,000 other whales on your list?

Save the Whales.

Seriously, Japan, leave the whales alone.

I mean really, why do you need to kill Humpback Whales? For fuel oil? Just to be dicks about it?

"Save the Whales" is one of those phrases that gets thrown around like its the stupidest thing they've ever heard by people who are politically motivated to think destruction of the environment is cool.

But really, what's the problem with saving whales? It's not like it costs us anything. Or that the world can't survive without whale-based products. Or that we can't build a new suburb or Big Box shopping center because whales are in the way.

You don't even have to do anything to save the whales - except not kill them. (Not like recycling, which is such a pain in the lifestyle.)

There is literally no drawback to saving the whales.

So why the hate for the whale savers?

Programming note: Stay tuned for more of the adventures of Number One in the next episode when Girl Cousin and the G-Parents come to town.

Global Warming.

Just because Al Gore says global warming is happening, doesn't mean it's not.

Up, Down.

I got to tell you - the beginning of last week was not good. Mom and Number One were in a constant battle, it seemed. Was she eating enough? Too much? What was the problem?

So, Thursday we went to the Pediatrician - who is awesome by the way. Everything is fine. She's gaining weight. Babies are just like that. Call me next Tuesday if it's still horrible.

Since then, she's been a joy. Mom has been less stressed. Number One has been happy as a lark. She even rolled over from her tummy to back for the first time.

Parenthood is going to suck be really awesome.

China.

I don't like China. I know it's not very cool to say you don't like a whole country, but it's true. And it's not that I don't like Chinese people - the few I've met were perfectly fine people. And I'm all about the Eastern philosophies.

It's the Chinese Communist/Capitalist dictatorship that I don't like. It's an oppressive and nasty regime. And yet, the American government seems to tolerate it because a few multinationals are making a bazillion dollars taking advantage of what amounts to government slavery.

And then there's the environment.

Despite my best efforts to remain positive and believe that people are about to turn the corner and do the right thing, stories about China always depress me. When I read about China, it's hard for me not to get discouraged to the point of futility.

Usually, I don't even read the stories anymore. I read the headline and think, "Oh, China is fucking some more shit up..."

What else do I need to know?

Mojo Nixon.

I don't know if they've done any studies on the effects of rock n' roll on infants, but I hope I'm not stunting her development.

In the evenings, we've found that one of Number One's favorite activities is Dance Party with Papa. She particularly likes the Ramones. She can go from fussy to passed out during I Wanna Be Sedated.

On the plus side, it's been a great chance for me to dig into my collection and find some old favorites.

Tonight she totally got into Mojo Nixon and the Toad Liquors.

Are you drinking with me, Jesus? Indeed.

Being a New Dad.

Being a New Dad is hard. And time consuming.

The good news is Number One likes the hammock almost as much as I do.

This week's news.

It seems like during the week I hardly have time to post anything, so here's the highlight reel...

Last night Number One was so tired she didn't want to go to sleep. She had been fuss-crying for about two hours, and by about 11 p.m., Mom and I were getting on to our rope's end. Finally, I got Number One to drift off to sleep - in her crib no less.

Then she slept until almost 6 a.m.

It. Was. Awesome.

Superwife decided I have the magic touch.

The other day I was holding Number One right after she had been fed, and she let loose what I can only describe as a Muppet Vomit.

Without warning, she opened her mouth, and half-digested milk shot out like, well, like if a Muppet projectile vomited. Seriously, there was no warning, no apparent strain on her part, and just like that, it was over - imagine if Kermit threw up and then acted like nothing happened.

Number One and I made our first solo trip out of the house this morning. A trip to Whole Foods for the weekly shopping. It was victoriously uneventful.